I’m not okay.
As much as I try to pretend like I am, I’m not.
None of us are. You were such a beautiful, loving, and selfless young woman, and it hurts beyond what words can describe that you’re gone. Believe me Favee, your absence is felt and your presence will be greatly missed and always remembered.
Some of you may remember three weeks ago when our rant covered the stages of grief in the post, “Sometimes In Life, Things Happen.” I talked about the five stages along with some tips to getting through that rough time. But what I didn’t know, and could have NEVER imagined , was that when you asked me to write that blog for you, that I’d be needing those tips for myself.
I could rant about how we first met on Myspace because we both had the same sunglasses and pose in our default pictures. Or how we clicked instantly and were more like sisters than friends. I could talk about the times you were there for me when a lot of people I expected to be there, let me down. I could even go as far as to rant about the times we were penny pinching with Aquil and Jelahn at Apple Bees just to get a break from things we were all dealing with at home. And how when we all started “coming up,” that always remained OUR spot to celebrate the highs, talk out the lows, and map out our master plans for the future. But I’m not going to do that. While I am hurt, and I am heartbroken and any other indescribable words one could name, I want people to remember your love. Remember the way you supported EVERYBODY and asked for NOTHING. Remember your honesty — that when someone needed to hear something, if no one else told them, you did. Remember your humor. That little giggle you’d make right before and after saying something funny. Remember the side eye you gave when someone was trying to be slick. Importantly, remember HER. Remember the seeds she planted in each and every one of our lives and continue to water and nurture them as she did.
What I’m coming to realize is that while I may not be okay now, someday I will be. We all have got to focus on the great memories and understand that the good will keep us going.
Please remember that as a continuation of this post, there will be a part two tonight at 7:23p.m. Your continued support is greatly appreciated.
– Yolanda Danae’